It is a sin to pray for our dead,
my mother said, your grandpa, aunt, sister,
they’re no longer your concern. I learned
what is permitted, what is forbidden.
During our nightly prayer, mother shaped
my unsteady hands into a shy plant.
I closed myself for an invisible
Father, out of fear for the visible
mother in front of me. I stayed silent
during this ritual, a good flower
I was: never speaking, just listening.
One night, I heard a secret, my mother
praying for a forbidden name, Dagna,
a name I’ve learned not to say, my sister’s.
Published in Cider Press Review, Volume 24, Issue 5.
Jeddie Sophronius is a Chinese-Indonesian writer from Jakarta. He received his MFA from the University of Virginia, where he served as the editor of Meridian. His work has appeared in Prairie Schooner, The Cincinnati Review, The Iowa Review, and elsewhere. They divide their time between the U.S. and Indonesia. Read more of their work at nakedcentaur.com
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